Restaurant Review: Applebee's - Northgate Mall

Me and husband were going to dinner - trying something new to us - and we decided on Applebee's. 

Colerain/Northgate has a ton of chains - so it's pretty hard to avoid them. Plus - there have been some commercials for Applebee's bar menu that looked good. So...we'll see...

They have these new table screens that are pretty nifty. You can order some items from them - drinks & apps - but not your whole meal. That seems odd to me - why would I just order part of my dinner? There are also games to play on the screen - some free and some $$.

With the apps & bar snacks - they have a mix & match special of 2 for $9 or 3 for $12. I decided to try three different ones. They really were pretty drool-worthy on TV -

SALSA VERDE NACHOS

Choice of shredded brisket or pulled pork, spicy queso blanco, pico, fresh jalapeños. $9.99

First up were the nachos - I chose pulled pork. These were just odd. They had a seasoning sprinkled on them that was a bit overpowering. The combo of the queso and shredded cheese was okay - but even the queso had an odd flavor. The jalapenos were raw rather than pickled so they were just bitey. The whole thing just tasted off - I'm not saying something was "bad" (as in - expired) - it just didn't taste good.

SWEET CHILE BRISKET SLIDERS

Spicy sweet Asian chile sauce, fresh diced pineapple. $9.99

How can you go wrong with sliders? Apparently putting them in a chile sauce with pineapple - that's how. Seriously these were HORRENDOUS. The brisket was tough, the sauce was bitter and the buns were stale. I took two bites and just stopped. And you know me - I love food. I rarely just go, "Yeah - that right there is too disgusting to even eat." - but this fit the bill. 

CHURRO S'MORES

Churro twists, toasted marshmallow & chocolate dip.$4.49

Lastly I chose the Churro S'mores. Again - HOW CAN YOU JACK UP A CHURRO?????? Well - the magic of Applebee's - that's how! The base churro was fine - but they coated the whole thing in cocoa, cinnamon and sugar so it had this awful dry & bitter powdery taste. I mean - my favorite churro is from Taco Johns - a crappy fast food place in Iowa - so I'm not a churro snob - but these - AWFUL. Aw. Ful. 

BONELESS WINGS

Choice of honey BBQ, spicy sweet Asian chile, classic or hot buffalo sauce. $9.99

Larry got what he always gets - classic buffalo boneless wings. They were fine. 

Thankfully the night wasn't a complete disaster - we saw Spy with Melissa McCarthy and Jason Statham. Great fun movie and thankfully - the theater had popcorn to make up for the disaster that was dinner. 

Why Should You Go? Oh please don't. I'm not a chain-basher - I love me some Olive Garden, Red Lobster and Longhorn Steakhouse - but this meal was just terrible from start to finish. Every app tasted worse than the one before it. So don't be fooled by those commercials - steer clear. But hey - when Spy comes out on DVD - rent it - it's funny! (His name should be Stath-Yum!)